Saturday, 8 July 2017

Not a good day

In spite of going out for Lunch with friend, w, and then back to her house for a cup of coffee, then   later  to my son and daughter in law's house to look at their garden and their scarecrow (it is the village's Open Gardens and Scarecrow Day tomorrow) this has really not been a good day.

It is a sad fact in bereavement that one has good and bad days for no apparent reason whatsoever.   I have tried to keep cheerful all day but without much success.   I now intend to take Tess for a walk in the late evening sunshine which, hopefully, will put me in a better frame of mind.

33 comments:

A Heron's View said...

One day at a time pat and tomorrow is another day, blessings to you.

Rachel said...

Sometimes being alone with memories is the order of the day. Today is one such day and a night to slow down x

Sooze said...

I'm sorry to hear it's not a good day. I hope the walk in the sunshine with Tess cheers you.

Joanne Noragon said...

And if you bawl your eyes red, it's OK. Today is well on the way to tomorrow, now.

Virginia said...

thinking of you as our Southern Hemisphere day starts, and hoping a good night's sleep brings a better day for you tomorrow. I found not only 'good and bad days' but the sudden WHAM of grief that hit unexpectedly - like when driving down the road - difficult to cope with. Love to you, Courageous One.

justjill said...

A whammy as they say. Hope for a peaceful night and improved day tomorrow.

Mac n' Janet said...

Sometimes feeling sad is what you need to do. It's hard work being "up" all the time.

Sue said...

It's okay to be sad. Perhaps you just need some quiet time with Tess.

Yorkshire Pudding said...

Emotions are funny things. They defy logic and we can't truly control them. Everything will begin to fall into place when you are settled in your new home in Leyburn. At the moment you're in limbo.

Heather said...

Don't fight it Pat - it is perfectly normal as I am sure you know. Some days are good, others not. Such huge adjustments to cope with.

dindin said...

as a counselor who deals with grief, what you are feeling is perfectly normal. best advice would be to cry, or if you like write a letter to your man. tell him how you are feeling and then either burn it or put it away.

Sue in Suffolk said...

Ups and downs, you will get through them. Wishing you a better tomorrow.

Frugal in Essex Tania said...

Hoping things feel better for you tomorrow.

Hard up Hester said...

Have a virtual hug from me Pat, I hope you feel better soon.

Gardener Fisher said...

Ŵhat a day. I ha e a handicapped son and each day is a bitch. Today was a good day, that is good. I took my son out for a drive, it was lovely, I drank half a bottle of scotch to get over it, everyone needs some space.

Gail, northern California said...

You haven't lost your mind. It's just a sad, helpless, hopeless feeling. It will pass, and come again. Be good to yourself.

donna baker said...

Oh dear sweet Pat, I am sorry. I remember you saying the weekends are hardest. Glad you went through the motions anyway. I think it is important for you.

Thickethouse.wordpress said...

I am so impressed by how you work at keeping engaged with life and family and friends. But I remember how those first few years, actually, sadness would wash over me from time to time. It is what it is, and perfectly normal. The work of grief. Be well, and remember how many people you have never even met are wishing you well! Hugs from Ohio.

Cro Magnon said...

It's all part of the process Weave. Occasionally it's good to just be alone and have a really good cry. Chin up!

Jules said...

I do hope tomorrow is a better day for you Pat. X

Bless said...

Hope the walk helped. One needs to take the time to mourn and grieve. Just take it one day at a time. I hope tomorrow will be better.

Jenny said...

You are allowed to have bad days, we all have them without going through a such a sad time as you. Be kind to yourself and let the grief pass, it will come back but hopefully get a bit easier. Sending good thoughts and hopefully some sunshine from Italy.

Tom Stephenson said...

When my mother died, my father said that he would never get over it. I said that he might get used to it, though.

Linda Metcalf said...

It's bound to happen now and again...a little cry for what is gone. Chin up and hope for a better day.

Granny Sue said...

Yes, it's like a river inside you that rages some days, and sparkles in the sun on others. And sometimes it just overflows its banks and there's no stopping the flood of memories and sadness. Peace to you, Pat, and my prayers.

Derek Faulkner said...

I think Tom got it dead right.
All your friends on here are doing their best feeling sorry for you and picking you up on a daily basis, but only you can take the necessary steps forward, hard as they might be.

Ellen D. said...

You are helping so many by sharing your honest feelings with simple elegance, yet so truthfully! Thank you for writing such heartfelt posts! You always give me something to lift my spirits or make me think! Thank you so much!

Countryside Tales said...

Thinking of you. Be gentle with yourself.

angryparsnip said...

I remember sitting down one evening before bed an a wave, it felt like a wave in the ocean, picked me up and the sadness swirled over and around me. It was so strange it came and went in a second but the feeling stayed will me for a long time. My x walked out I was left taking care of the children and myself. All the stress and just not knowing what to do overwhelmed me.
It just became one of those days.
Just know you will have them and there is nothing you can do but remember there will be sadness and then more good days.

cheers, parsnip and thehamish

Bovey Belle said...

Tomorrow is another day Pat, and hopefully an easier one. Grief is like a roller coaster and you never know what little things will set you off. Wiser words have been written by the other readers of this post and I hope they bring you comfort.

The Weaver of Grass said...

As usual wise words from you all and a tremendous boost to my morale. You are right - I am much better today. Thank you all so much.

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Fairtrader said...

Let's hope for the good days to slowly increase, they will eventually but as long as love has been a part of your life, the loss will always be present but not always hurting. That's my experience, anyway. Don't loose hope, Pat!!!