Thursday, 30 March 2017

Jobs..jobs..jobs...

There are so many jobs to do.   I am pressing on with them and gradually ticking them off my list.   Each one helps to relieve the tension when it is done.

Once the Farmer's funeral is over then I feel I shall collapse in a heap but begin to pick up the pieces.  In the meantime, thanks for your words of comfort and support -everything helps to maintain some kind of equilibrium.

44 comments:

Yarrow said...

Oh, I am so sorry to read of your sad news. I cannot imagine how you must be feeling. I want to add my love and best wishes to those sent by your other blogging friends. I wish I could say more. xxx

Chickpea said...

Take that time to collapse in a heap and stay there as long as you need xx

Gwil W said...

Fortunately you'll be spared a lot of kafkaesque officialdom. You can't believe all the hoops I have to jump through to get anything remotely official done.

thelma said...

Keep strong, but collapse in a heap soon, and let your friends help.xxx

Rachel said...

The solicitor, bank and accountant will keep you busy.

Maureen Reynolds said...

I grieve with you on your loss of The Farmer. Collapse when you need to and let your heart break so it can let the new in..slowly.

Hold your right ring finger with your left hand, any way it feels right is right, and your body will let you grieve when you are ready. This finger is connected to that deep and painful emotion. Love and cross the Atlantic hugs.

Mary said...

Dear Pat, hoping each day will be the way forward with tiny sparks of happiness between your periods of grief - the sun shining on the spring blooms, the lambs gamboling across those English meadows, the trees leafing out etc. All those things the Farmer loved I know, and you need to still see them and enjoy them as well as grieve, which is only natural of course. Enjoy the light, he would want that for you my dear.
With love, Mary -

Devon said...

Yesterday I had a guest speaker at work and she told the group that in grief, reality usually sets in around 8 weeks. Once the funeral is over and we move on to our daily lives, that is often a the time when support from loved ones is so very helpful.
I think of you often and wish I were close enough to drop by with soup and flowers, and then again in 8 weeks. :)

Minigranny said...

Good for you for ploughing on with those jobs! Collapsing in a heap is fine when they are done. Take care. Sheila x

Derek Faulkner said...

After the funeral is when family and close friends pick you up and point the way forward, as much as you'd like to, you can't go backwards. Are you still moving?

Shirley McLaurin said...

So sorry for your loss. Hopefully some sunshine and signs of Spring may bring a little happiness to your life at the moment. Best wishes :)

angryparsnip said...

I make a very nice roast chicken with a great salad that I would bring over along with thehamish for Tess to play with.

Wish I lived closer.
cheers, parsnip and thehamish

donna baker said...

Dear Mary said it perfectly. I do hope the paperwork isn't as bad as it is here in the US. Glad to hear from you.

Sue in Suffolk said...

I don't have the words to say so just sending a ((HUG))

justjill said...

As others have said this time of sorting out officialdom helps in the beginning. Just collapse afterwards and look around you. Things never stay the same and soon you will begin to look forward. xxx

Librarian said...

I know only too well what you mean. I pretty much collapsed after the first two weeks, when the first funeral was over. I say "first", because we had two services; after the one here in Germany, I took the urn with my husband's ashes to Yorkshire where we had another service for his friends and family, and spread the ashes at Barnsley's garden of remembrance.
All those jobs are important to an extent, but do look after yourself as well, please.

Iris said...

All those tasks are stressful, but they also keep you moving forward at the same time. I wish you continued strength for everything that needs to be done and healing peace and quiet when it's time to collapse and take a breather. We'll be here for you (through thick and thin and all ...)!

Sue said...

Keeping busy helps and then, yes, collapse in a heap and let yourself grieve. Your friends and family will help you to be strong again.

annie b said...

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep,
I am a thousand winds that blow
I am the diamond glints on snow
I am the sunlight on ripened grain
I am the gentle Autumn rain

When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quite birds in circled flight
I am the soft stars that shine at night
Do not stand at my grave and cry
I am not there, I did not die

The beautiful countryside that you live in makes the above all the more poignant. Take care of yourself
Anniex

Theresa Young said...

Keeping busy is good. rest is good too. So is grieving. Just take it one day at a time. Hugs and prayers coming your way

jenny_o said...

So sorry for your loss, Weaver. No matter how soft a passing, no matter how inevitable it is for anyone, it still leaves such an empty place when our loved one is gone. Keeping busy has its time; so will collapsing in a heap, as you say. Wishing you strength.

Hilary said...

Hang in there Pat.....life goes on........you will get through this.

Penny said...

Such a sad time for you, and so many things to be done. Hang in there. Thinking of you.

Manchester Lass, Now and Then said...

Sending love and special thoughts, take good care of yourself Pat♥ Love Linda xx

Rozzie said...

Sending you some cyber {{{{hugs}}}}, dear Weaver.

Bovey Belle said...

The hinterland between a death and a funeral is a time spent in limbo and of course, one cannot move on. Thinking of you at such a difficult time, and hoping that by keeping busy, you are able to deal with things. (((HUGS))) Love, Jennie xx

Suzie Simplelife said...

Courage dear Weaver....one day at a time. Sending you best wishes s

Karen Reittinger said...

Love and prayers.

Elizabeth said...

Thinking of you often. Sending warmest wishes at this tough time.

Simon Douglas Thompson said...

So many things to do but stay strong

Barbara Womack said...

Oh, dear Pat...
Words fail. Sending much love your way.

Hildred said...

Dear Pat, - I hope you are coping with these difficult days. They come upon us so suddenly and when they are over seem such a blur. Think of you often and know that your strength will not let you down. Lean on your friends, - they will always be a comfort.

The Weaver of Grass said...

Thanks to everyone.

Gardener Fisher said...

Sorry to be blunt but when my father died the best advice I received was to get at least 20 death certificates from the coroner. You need them for everything and a good supply makes your life so much simpler. What a horrible time for you though, I have read your blog for years, it was a welcome escape from my terrible job in London and when I finally left and moved to the country your regular updates have always cheered me up. All he best.

Shelly Williams said...

Hi Pat, don't be afraid of asking people to help you with all of your jobs , let them lighten the load where you feel they can .
Thinking of you xx
Shelly

Fairtrader said...

In all your frailty you seem to me a strong person, Pat. I hope and sincerely think you will get through this, you have some good and sound advice here, please listen to them, spare yourself, accept help, take support from those around you. In a very short time of just a few months, three of my blogfriends have lost someone dear, I for one feel insufficient , you are so far away. But like many here I pray, and wish for the best. You will be very tired after all this , just like you wrote , but life and light will come back to you, eventually. I am glad I found your blog a year ago, you are an inspiration! Bless you!

Beacee said...

Just sending a hug,
Barbara x

dixie heath said...

Thinking of you Pat and prayers for you and your family. When this is over you will need time to rest. Lean on your friends and family . I have read your blog so long you seem like a close friend. When I lost my daughter and my mom it seemed so unreal not to have them here but I kept busy and rested a lot and took some time for myself. We are all here for you in spirit. Have coffee with your friends and let that help you to cope. Hope the sun is shinning today for you...it is gloomy here and rain expected in Ohio USA. (((cyber hugs from me ))

Unknown said...

I am so sorry to learn of your recent loss.

Irene

Frances said...

Dear Pat, I'm sending you lots of hugs and love. I admire you so much and so wish I lived closer to be of true practical help to you. xo

rallentanda said...

I am so sorry for your loss.You give a lot of comfort and peace to your readers sharing your lovely life with the farmer with bloggers from all over the world.God bless you and give you the strength to get through this harrowing time.

Beachcomber said...

Have been thinking about you a lot over the past few weeks and especially now as I assume the farmer's funeral is imminent or just past.
As several people have said you seem like part of the family albeit an online part and I would so much like to support you.
In reality I'm sure you will have lots of support locally.
Do allow them to help. That will help them too.
Take care and pamper yourself a little when all the formal part of things is over.
With my very best wishes. Sue

Heather said...

I can sympathise with you on all levels. My head was spinning with the number of things to do when Dick died. I have been fortunate to have so much help and I hope you have a good support team too. Be kind to yourself and I hope you will feel a little better after the funeral has taken place, though the legalities do tend to drag on somewhat. Thinking of you.x

Penhill said...

Thought of you today.Take all the help people offer,find peace in the spring sunshine in our glorious Dales.