Monday, 19 January 2009

Merlin.

Your imprint
on the window,
pale, spectral dust.

Your cowering
in the corner,
eyes wild,
full of fear.

Rough hands
felt your bones,
found the fine breaks,
saw your wildness,
saw a future in captivity.

I held your still-warm body
in my hands.
Your square head.
Your banded tail.
Your soft blue plumage.
Your dull eyes; all wildness gone.

20 comments:

Coastcard said...

What an evocative poem. Strangely, I was looking at a photograph of a bird imprint on a window pane in a magazine at the w/e ... I wonder which magazine it was!

Mad Bush Farm Crew said...

That is a great poem Weaver. Loved it. Shackleton was an amazing man. Their ordeal on Elephant Island was a test of endurance so was his journey from there with his men to go and find help. I loved the bone china as well. I have some Claris Cliff that belonged to my grandmother. I treasure it.

Nice to see Rambo has done his job with tupping. The ladies in a few months time will have some cute little long tailed lambs to keep them busy. I just love your blog!

Take care
Liz

Raph G. Neckmann said...

What a beautiful poem, Weaver, and how sad - it made me cry.

jinksy said...

A touch of Monday melancholy with this one, W of G. Very poignant.

Poet in Residence said...

Lovely, lovely poem. Kind of D H Lawrence feel to it.
I think the word "skilled" in verse three is not required.

Hands
felt your bones...etc

is better in my humble opinion. It's stronger. More immediate. We will deduce that the hands are skilled for ourselves as we read on.

Best,
Gwilym

Cathy said...

So beautiful. Thank you for a nice start to my Monday morning!

Poet in Residence said...

In fact when I read it again now I think "Rough hands" would be an improvement on "Skilled hands", in fact I've gone completely off this word "skilled", for it doesn't describe the hands but only the owner of the hands...and that you certainly don't want.
Why you don't want it is because the subject is the Merlin and when you admire these skilled hands you are taking something away from the subject rather than adding to it.
"Rough hands" would be ok because it gives a real picture of the rough hands against the delicate bird. A contrast is thus established.
The rest of the poem now impacts even more.
Best,
Gwilym

Janice Thomson said...

Beautiful poignant moments you've captured Weaver - love this.

Gramma Ann said...

Lovely poem, but sad also.

Weaver of The Grass, there is an award waiting for you at my blog:
http://annsreadingcorner.blogspot.com

willow said...

Beautiful imagery. I hate it when a bird flies into the windows of the french door and lands lifeless on the deck. It happens quite often here. Poor dears.

The Weaver of Grass said...

There ie a photograph in this month's RSPB magazine of what the letter writer thought was an owl imprint but which RSPB said was a pigeon. In our case we actually found the injured merlin Coastcard.

The Weaver of Grass said...

So glad you enjoy reading my blog, madbush. I enjoy writing it immensely. Very cold here - bet you are having warm weather!

The Weaver of Grass said...

Glad you liked the poem Raph.

The Weaver of Grass said...

Thank you Jinksy.

The Weaver of Grass said...

thanks PiR. You are quite right. You will see that I have changed it. Never feel that you can't suggest improvements to my poems - I really appreciate any suggestions and am grateful for the advice.

The Weaver of Grass said...

Thanks to everyone else - I have visitors this week and so have limited time to write comments - but be assured that I do appreciate them all. Thanks for the award gramma ann - shall call when I have a few minutes.

Woman in a Window said...

Hopefully with a shake of the head the wild will return!

Crafty Green Poet said...

you describe the situation so well, it is so sad, poor bird,

mand said...

Lovely poem, vivid.

I've heard that hanging a reflective 'crystal' at the top of a window can help avoid the reflections that confuse birds. We used to get a lot of this (though they were often fine after a bit) until we gave up cleaning the windows... no more deceptive reflection! lol

S.L. Corsua said...

I admire the tightness of this piece. The compression really works. And Gwilym's suggestion (with accompanying helpful insight) did strengthen the third stanza. Loved all the images, from the 'imprint... dust' to the 'dull eyes.' Cheers.