Great excitement over breakfast this morning - well great excitement for this little backwoods where nothing much happens out of the ordinary.
There we are, the farmer and I, eating our Weetabix, when suddenly he jumps up and says 'there's a herd of cows trotting past down the lane'.
And sure enough forty- odd cows were going down the lane at quite a gallop, udders swinging, poo issuing forth from their rear ends with great gusto!
The farmer dashed outside and quickly shut the farm gate so that they couldn't get into the yard. Then he yelled at me to ring S (another local farmer).
After milking, his cows cross a couple of fields from his parlour, cross the lane and go into the pasture on the other side. Looking out we could see that the first thirty or so cows had indeed gone where they should go, but then the rest had decided to have a little caper down the road.
The farmer dashed round the back into next door's yard to stop them going round into there (imagine the mess) and meanwhile I rang and got hold of the farm.
Our neighbour's guard dog barked and stopped them in their tracks with the noise. And at that moment a car came up the lane and the lot turned tail and legged it back to where they should be - obviously thinking it was safer to get back than to go on into unknown territory.
Later S and D, the farmer's wife and son, arrived with stiff brushes and big shovels to clean as much of the mess off the lane as they could. By this time the farmer was mowing the front lawn, so they came into the garden to say thank-you.
There's always one cow - most likely the dominant one in the herd - who can lead the rest astray (a bit like humans, I suppose).
Anyway, we returned to rather mushy Weetabix, made a fresh cup of tea and resumed our morning paper reading - that's enough excitement for one day.