Saturday, 5 October 2013

All kinds of weather.

Yesterday we had to be in Middlesbrough (40 miles away) for 9am, so it was an early start for me - not so for the farmer who is always up early (fifty years of milking cows means that his brain is set to wake him up at around 5am).   During our journey we encountered absolutely every kind of Autumn weather.   We left here in very thick fog;  the fog cleared to reveal a grey day;   then the sun broke through;   then it poured with rain.   When we returned I took Tess for a walk.   It was a lovely Autumn day with smells of rotting leaves, sycamore trees in their Autumn glory, a gentle breeze and a very warm sun.   My friend W and I were expecting to go to the new Marks and Spencer flagship store in Durham but I had only been back from my walk for five minutes when it poured with rain.
And we did not fancy a journey of 60 miles up the A1 on a Friday afternoon in torrential rain.  So instead we went to a local Farm Shop/Cafe for a pot of tea and a piece of cake (cheese scone for me and coffee and walnut cake for W).

There were men with women in the cafe (there was a day when one would have said husbands with their wives, but not so these days).  But there were no men sitting together chatting.   Is this going into a cafe for afternoon tea a woman thing?   When I think about it - do men have friends like women do?   I suppose they have golfing friends, or friends at 'the club', or walking friends (in the case of the farmer) - but in no instance would the farmer ring one of his walking friends up just for a chat, or to suggest they went out to a cafe for a cup of tea. Do men and women have different needs on the friendship front?  I suppose a man might ring a male friend and arrange to meet him down the pub for a pint.

Or perhaps it is an age thing.   Perhaps young men regularly meet their friends but as men get older they no longer need to do this.   I don't know but it would be interesting to find out.

Ah well, the moving finger writes and having writ moves us - I shall now go and get washed and dressed.   No shower today as I have this ECG thing hanging round my waist, but when I think about the days when folk only had a bath on a Friday night whether they needed it or not (and often in the water which had already been used by older brothers and sisters) one day should not make it necessary for folk to avoid me.   Enjoy your weekend whatever you are doing - and if you are in the UK, enjoy this flash of Autumn weather; it is not set to last.

10 comments: said...

Pot of tea and cake sounds lovely.
Your little dog Tess looks very cute.
Have a good weekend.

Heather said...

I think that men meeting up with their friends might be an age thing. As you say, when they are young they like to get together and then as they mature there is not such a need. But when they are much older (the farmer hasn't reached that stage) they again like to meet their friends and mull over old times. Or maybe it is all down to personal preference. Your day sounded very pleasant whatever the weather and tea and cake are always welcome.

Elizabeth said...

Your weather does sound remarkably changeable!
Men go to pubs of corse -but do they actually talk?
Maybe some do, but many just like the companionship.
Talking does not seem to be their forte.
I love the Italian word for chatterbox "chiecheria"
key- ack- yer eye- a

As ever, tea and cake soothe many things.
Off to see the tinies today and a Czech Oktoberfest tomorrow. Need to stay home to knit....

Pondside said...

Over here it's much the same. Men meet for golf or a drink - even young men, if observed in a coffee shop, are usually really waiting for young women. For the past year or so The Great Dane has been meeting another man for coffee once a week. Both are survivors of catastrophic heart episodes - they meet, chat, drink coffee and eat a muffin. It's a mutual support thing that has turned into friendship and I think they both look forward to their Monday mornings. I don't think, though, that TGD would ever just call a friend and suggest meeting for coffee somewhere.

Anonymous said...

When we are young we are energetic and meet our friends regularly. As days pass and get older we feel little lazy to go out.

angryparsnip said...

I think women always had friends that they met with to talk and have a pot of tea or whatever.
I read an article that based this on when women were married as property, investment or alliances. Women had friends to talk to as the men in their lives were not always who they would have picked or were off trying to invade another country or whatever they did in the 5th century and on.
I think women are just wired differently.
I like what @pondside said. My friends husband was like that . Every Friday he met with a group of friends, and cancer survivors for breakfast.
Your afternoon out sounds lovely.
Belly rubs to gud dug Tess.

cheers, parsnip

John Going Gently said...

I miss my male friends... 2 in Sheffield 1 in Manchester
If they were nearer I would see tem all the time

Anonymous said...

I think given the choice of pub, golf course or coffee shop to meet up with mates most men would opt for the first two...then in Australia there's the surf clubs also. My husband is a cyclist and the Mamals -(middle aged men in lycra)always factor in a coffee shop to finish off the ride - they are just as fussy with the coffee as their lycra and bikes - standing joke.

MorningAJ said...

K has one very good friend that he meets with regularly for chats but they go for a Chinese meal when they do. The rest are online pals. Not so different really.

Bovey Belle said...

For some reason Biker Men always meet up around these parts. They drive from West and East (and probably South and North too) on a Sunday, around the switch-back bends to and from Brecon to Llandovery, where they meet up for tea at a Cafe there. I guess they have bikes in common : ) Denise will testify to Biker friendships I'm sure (and the well-ridden road down to Scarboro').

As for my husband, we have joint husband and wife friends, from the Fleamarket and antiques circuit, but he doesn't have any male friends he would phone up for a chat. Unlike me and my female friends - some from childhood - but others who are friends who started as penpals, and more recently, internet/blogging/forum friends. Lifelong ones . . .