Poet in Residence (see my blog list) has set a challenge for poetry - the project is called 2010 and can be reached from his site. I will try to set up a link when Dominic finds time to come round and help me. In the meantime, if you would like to join in the challenge visit Poet's site for details. Here is my first offering and is a poem following my theme earlier in the new year about how the snow has outlined the old rig and furrow farming methods in the fields.
Snow.
I stand on the step
and look across
to where the snow
has scraped the field
threadbare.
Blackened lines delineate
the rigg.
Snow lies deep in the furrows;
snow, that temporary mortar
for dry stone walls that surround
this little world.
Here the foundations
of a house.
-small rooms,
-thick walls,
sited in the hollow
of the hill that reveals
its skeleton past.
Harsh the conditions
when men
shaped this landscape.
Their bones now lie
in narrow graves.
Monday 4 January 2010
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23 comments:
Superb imagery Weaver. How long did it take you write - it would take me a very long time just to come up with some ideas. I admire your talent.
Your poem perfectly evokes the the simplicity and hardship of the lives of those who once farmed your land. A Poetry Challenge sounds like something you will enjoy - I first came across your blog when you were doing the Poetry Mondays and admired your ability to produce such thoughtful writing in a short apace of time!
I read your poem as I looked out on the field, great match!
How's the snow at your place? Pretty much housebound here which I do not mind at all! Baked yesterday so hubby was packed off to work with provisions, bless dont want him wasting away! lol!
The spareness and simplicity of the language fit the bleakness of the scene it describes perfectly. The only suggestion for slight revision I'd make is to join the final stanza to the penultimate.
Cold and melancholic and snowy and crisp.A fine poetic memorial to hard times and stoic people. Pip pip,Weaver , well woven!
Good poetry on snow , I like the most , god bless you.
Regards
Dinesh Chandra
Your poem certainly conveys that a field is more than just a field - it too has a history, it holds life and death, it provides beauty.
Love the stark beauty of your header too.
A lovely, tight cold, elegant poem.
just what we would expect, Weaver.
I should try this, maybe.
Winter greetings.
Thanks TAS. I try my poetry out on my son, who is a much better poet than I - he usually suggests crossing out about half of the words I have in! How long does it take? Well - sometimes days, sometimes weeks and sometimes years - I still have poems I wrote several years ago that I am not satisfied with - so I think about them until a better word comes up.
Thanks for the comment alison.
Denise - I try to avoid baking because it inevitably leads to eating!
"snow, that temporary mortar
for dry stone walls that surround
this little world."
Now that's a lovely line. I'm so jealous of you poets. Scares me to death.
Thanks Dick - I will give your suggestion some thought. It is always hard to get ones ideas across in such a few words. I was trying to suggest that their lives had been narrow and that their deaths were still in narrow graves.
Thanks TFE - praise indeed. Yes they were stoics but then living where you do you know all about stoics in your history. Times were so hard and conditions so harsh that we can't begin to imagine what it was like.
Thank you for the compliment Bonnie.
Winter greetings to you too Elizabeth. Is it chilly in NY?
"temporary mortar"
Love that!
I like your sturdy country lines.
Aloha, Friend
Comfort Spiral
Very crisp and elegant poem - beautifully done, Weaver!
To be able to compose such beauty with words, I admire and I aspire. Weaver you are talented and inspiring.
Hello Weaver,
Happy New Year to you! I've just been enjoying a read through your recent snowbound posts. We haven't had any for the last two days but some is promised for today; we shall see but the freezing temps. keep everything white! I enjoyed your poem very much and reading the earlier background to it.
I like to look at trees too; it's marvellous how each season provides them with renewed beauty. Hope your daffodils continue to add colour and brightness to the house, and of course, you can always contribute with that vital bit of lipstick!
Take care in 2010. I shall look forward to more of your posts.
Thank you for all your comments - much appreciated - they always make me try harder to get a good poem.
Powerfully evocative and effective in what it doesn't say. Leaves just the right amount to the reader's imagination.
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