Wednesday 19 August 2009

A Transforming Moment.

First of all I have to admit to a very Senior Moment! About a week ago, reading someone on my blog list, I saw that he (I am pretty sure it was a he, but I might be wrong) was hosting a meme today asking us to write about a transforming moment in our lives. What a good idea, I thought and promptly left him a comment to say I would join in. Since when I have heard nothing from him and now - although I have searched my blog list - I can't remember who it was. All I know is that on my desk diary I have an asterisk today, and a note to saying "Transforming Moment today". Well dear friends, I have had a few, so I shall post about perhaps the most important - and hopefully whoever invited me to do it, will see it.

What chance moments or encounters steer us through our lives. Had we been on the other side of the street we might never have met a person who has become important to us. Had we not taken a particular job we might never have ended up in the city or countryside that shaped our later life......and so on. Some put it down to the fickle finger of fate. I put it down to chance really.

When my first husband and I retired from teaching in 1984 (in my case it was very early retirement, I am not THAT old!) we decided to stay in the city where we lived at the time. Then after three years we began to realise that it was the countryside we longed for and so we began to search for somewhere to live. And this is where chance stepped in. We wanted a little unspoilt village, we wanted to be fairly near to our son and our grandchildren, and we wanted plenty of nice countryside for walking in.
So what made us choose this village - we had never been here, nor did we know anyone here. The only criterion it fitted was that it was in The Yorkshire Dales and we had been walking in The Dales with friends a few times.

Sadly, four years later my husband died. And I should add here that "the village" really were marvellous - they gave me tremendous support during the time I nursed him at home - they made his passage as easy as was possible and I shall always be grateful for that.

I already knew the farmer from walking across his fields with our dogs and after two years I married him. That day will be sixteen years ago the day after tomorrow (21st August 1993).

So really, choosing a transforming moment - or as I prefer to call it - a pivotal moment - was easy. It was that day in September 1987 when, after looking at countless houses, cottages, bungalows in The Dales, we signed on the dotted line and settled here. Had we moved to any other village I would never have met the farmer and my life would have been very different.

As it is, I came out of retirement and became a farmer's wife - feeding the calves, doing the books, helping out in any way that I could, baking countless cakes and cooking huge meals for hungry workers. All that has subsided now with the retirement of the farmer but that tremendous U turn that took place in my life makes me feel very lucky. To have one very happy marriage is good - to have two is wonderful and I am eternally grateful for that tiny moment when I put my signature to that title deed.

Have a good day folks - I shall now begin the preparations to feed the Pennine Way walkers tonight as they land on our patch.

STOP THE PRESS! I have just been over to read Dave at Pics and Poems and he is taking part in the meme too - so I have been reminded that it is Steven at the golden fish who is hosting it - so do pop over and read them both.

33 comments:

gleaner said...

I like this Weaver, the chance moments that become our destiny.

Kay said...

Sometimes it seems as if the path we follow is already mapped out for us!!! Loved your pivotal post and glad you remembered who started it!! From another girl who cooks up a storm for the masses!!xx

Rachel Fox said...

You've done well for men! A lovely Dad, two lovely husbands, a lovely son...well done on all counts. Says something about you too (it's part luck but not all!).
x

Kim Palmer said...

Strange how with reflection we realise just how momentous some decisions turn out to be when they seemed so ordinary at the time. You have indeed been blessed Pat with two wonderful marriages, which must reflect on how special you are too!

Totalfeckineejit said...

That day in Sept 1987 was a lucky day for the village too, methinks :)

Elizabeth said...

Yes, I just looked it up and it is Steven --but you have discovered that by now!
Such a wonderful tale, Weaver.
You are fortunate indeed to have such a happy second chapter.
All best wishes to you both for many, many more years.

Unknown said...

Hello Willow,

I saw Steven's meme idea but decided against as I couldn't think of a suitable moment! Yours seems very clear and it's wonderful that it has brought you a double dose of happiness.

Jenn Jilks said...

Isn't the Universe amazing? Everything unfolds as it should!

We were married (hubby #2) Aug. 22, 2002. Happy Anniversary! He's taking me away for the day - and I do not know where, so I have had to prewrite my post on My Muskoka! So much fun.

Golden West said...

Thank you for this lovely glimpse into your life!

Tess Kincaid said...

And what a lovely transforming moment it was! Interesting how our ride through life takes its interesting twists and turns.

Unknown said...

Oh, Weaver,

Now that my own comment has come in to my computer, I see that I called you Willow again??!! Apologies to both of you!

Unknown said...

Yorkshire is an unlikely place to end up. I surprise myself at times when I find a new world to discover. How interesting or lives become. After enjoying your blog yesterday, I am thinking about our little train stops in life. I'm glad you remembered it was Steven's idea and enjoy your preparations for today!

Heather said...

What a wonderful 'transforming moment' story Weaver - your moving to the village must have been written in the stars. I'm so glad you found happiness a second time.

Barry said...

Strange the unexpected pathways (no pun intended) we follow in life and that lead us to a different fate than any we could have imagined.

Very interesting post!

Hildred said...

A great story, Weaver, and one that makes me happy for you. I often think about chance, and how it affects our lives, and that sometimes it depends upon the way we respond to the 'turn in the road'....life is a series of choices.

Leenie said...

Great post. It is good to be reminded of the quirks of fate, pivotal moments, or whatever, that becomes a turn on our path of life. What I have seen of your home and life look like you made a good decision.

steven said...

hello weaver, first of all, thanks so much for this beautiful story!! i tend to agree with those readers who have sugessted that your fortune has as much to do with you as with anything!!! good people draw goodness towards them. oh and thanks for figuring out who was hosting the meme!!! i hope that you get to wander 'round and read all the others. they're truly extraordinary!! i passed up the pennine way in the mid-eighties so i must have either gone near or passed over your land!! ha!! steven

Tommaso Gervasutti said...

Dear Weaver of Grass, it would be tremendously interesting if an exchange of transformative moments or pivotal moments could be organized among bloggers, in my case it would be hard to think about a real one...those coming to my mind are almost impossible to tell, words fail me, as for example one day in the seventies when I was looking at the landscape of Cortina valley in the Italian Dolomites in a week in which I didn't have much money and was eating sparingly- to save money and stay in that place as much as possible-... looking at the valley I had such a powerful dejà-vu I was almost knocked off...
I have been trying in vain to capture this with a poem but words are still failing me...I hope one day... The experience was just:"the valley at one with an Already Been"...not much for a good poem for now, but the moment is still so vivid...

Sid Smith said...

What a remarkable post. Sometimes we just "know" don't we and have to act upon that knowing.Being open to what's in front of us is really what it's all about.

Eryl said...

I love this story and am so glad you met the farmer and got a new lease of life. You really must have been much too young to retire in 1984!

Amy said...

So you live in a small town? Same here. That's the beauty of it, everyone knows each other and there's a much more friendly atmostphere than the city.

Kathryn Magendie said...

It is how I felt when moving to my little log house in the smoky mountains of western north carolina: I am Home.

A wonderful post....

Raph G. Neckmann said...

What a wonderful transforming moment, Weaver. And I agree with Totalfeckineejit too!

Delwyn said...

Hello Weaver

sometimes the universe moves like a tapestry under construction...an invisible pattern...a master hand...the weft and warp...

Oh Happy days for you


Happy days

Poetic Artist said...

I love the story of your moment.
Moments are so important.

BT said...

What a lovely post Weaver. I often wondered about your two husbands. How lucky you were indeed. So glad you found out who suggested this. It brought forth a great post from you too.

Cloudia said...

Thank you for sharing this beauty with us! So much in your post today touched my heart.
Very Happy Anniversary to you!
I'm so happy to know (and read) you.

Aloha-
Comfort Spiral

Janice Thomson said...

We don't always know what's right around the corner with the choices we make.
What a treat to read about such wonderful transforming moments in your life Weaver.

The Weaver of Grass said...

Thanks everyone - we all need these transforming moments in our lives - may they be many and may they all be for good.

Bonnie Zieman, M.Ed. said...

Just a lovely glimpse into your life and how one decision - put you in the place to eventually have a second good marriage. You are blessed and I love coming to your blog and getting a peek into the life of the farmer's wife!

Titus said...

Oh Weaver, this was a beautiful post, and shows how life moves through very difficult times to very joyous ones. This is not a phrase I use much, but it seems so appropriate here - heart-warming. Thank you.

Pamela Terry and Edward said...

One never knows the twists and turns life will take. And I think that's probably best, don't you? So much better to wait and see what happens next.

Loon said...

Your story warms my heart and head and has made my day. Sounds as if you have been doing a bit of transforming your world, too, as well as being transformed.