Saturday 3 June 2023

Is it worth it?

Is it indeed?

I have neither the ability or the wish to be in the public eye - marriage, motherhood, friendships, hobbies and now what at ninety I can only call Super-retirement have suited me fine.   But watching Phillip Schofield being 'hauled over the coals', seeing his demeanour and his face in the few clips which were put on the News over the last couple of days has made me think a lot about things.   Sitting in the sun, unable to be active, leaves me with plenty of time to think and, I can tell you, I have been thinking.   That tortured face left me feeling 'drained'.

Has 'ordinary' life always been like this?   I suppose it has.   Are we 'above' animals?   We certainly think we are.   But sex has always 'reared its ugly head'.   There have always been what we will call 'indiscretions'. 

At one end of the scale is what I will call 'Physical Attraction'.  For the unattached then this is, of course, the beginning of a relationship.   But once in a loving relationship that doesn't mean that one never again meets/comes across other people to whom one could become attracted.  And that feeling can often be mutual.   But the 'loyal' personal even if they recognise the fact,  doesn't follow it up. 

"We aren't animals, we don't let our instincts take over"!  Or something like that.

But who are we to judge?    There always have been what I will call 'Broom cupboard incidents', the looks, the touching inappropriately, the things one regrets instantly.

But if one is in the public eye then the slightest thing becomes instantly public knowledge.   Now we read of remote controlled sex toys in  Parliament (really?), of indiscriminate sex - often regretted instantly -. 

It is easy to stop reading about all these indiscretions, easy to push the off switch on the TV remote control.

With our politicians do we expect them to be 'whiter than white'?   With public figures in Show Business do we expect them all (folk dressed to kill, made up to the nines, often in situations where they are almost expected to advertise their availability) to be innocent?

I am not speaking here of the Jimmy Savilles, the Rolf Harrises and the like.   I am speaking of Law Abiding citizens who pay their taxes.

Can any of us, hand on heart, say there have not been some situations in our lives when temptation has been put our way?  Some of us can say we did not carry it through, other may have done but regretted it.   That doesn't matter - it is personal choice.   What does matter that - providing the law is not broken - should it become public knowledge?

I am not arguing for or against.   And, frankly, I just do not care how many children Boris Johnson has fathered.   But what |I do care about is the public 'hounding' of individuals in the public eye just for the sake of a 'good story'.

Anyone breaking the law deserves investigation whoever they are - and punishment where any offence is proven.   But seeing Phillip Schofield's face and demeanour in that TV interview just made me think, probably selfishly, 'thank God he is not my son' - because I fear for him frankly.


 

36 comments:

gz said...

He is being torn to bits by the media...what other unrelated story are the media trying to hide?
Ok, he should have been more open...but he had already been open with regard to his sexuality, It's not as if he was like a certain Mr. Saville....and it looks like everyone working there knew of this friendship.
When you think about it, it is all completely unrelated to him actually doing the job he was paid for.
They build them up....and they certainly knock them down.

Tom Stephenson said...

There has been a sinister witch-hunt involving Phillip Schofield going on for weeks before this happened. I noticed a series of deep-fake photos on Instagram, purportedly showing him being dragged away in handcuffs by a couple of uniformed police and a caption which invited you to read the full story by going in deeper. I never did because I did not know or trust the organisation which put them up. Someone had a plan for his downfall. The same people are now focussing their attention toward someone else who I have never heard of. A politician I think.

Joan (Devon) said...

I do not like Philip Schofield and it isn't because of this sensationalism. I liked him when he was the anchor man on children's TV programmes back in the day, but now I feel he is too full of his own importance. I haven't been following any of this 'news' because I really don't care what he or anyone showbusinessy does or says about anything. Unfortunately my husband keeps me informed of the latest revelations. I tell him I don't care, but he still tells me.

Rachel Phillips said...

I don't follow any of it. I have no interest. I see his name on my phone when I wake up each day and delete.

Justme said...

A considered and articulate piece Pat. I have no interest in the cult of celebrity and unless this man has broken the law, which would rightfully indicate a criminal charge and subsequent trial, the I see no reason to rake over his misdemeanours and poor judgement. Regards, Sally

thelma said...

Pat I think it is a sad indictment of the times we live in, to witch hunt celebrities for cheap sensationalism.
all I can say is that these commentators who bring the news must live very boring lives. One day perhaps there will be an 'off' button to get rid of nonsense.

Sarah Browne said...

Thank goodness I neither read the papers or watch TV, totally unaware of this person, there are far more interesting things in my life, walking, gardening, reading, who needs popular culture or modern media. Sarah Browne

Anonymous said...

Who is philip schofield anyway?

Librarian said...

I don‘t know who he is, but it does not really matter - once his story has been milked until there is nothing left, someone else, some other sensation, will make the headlines. It was ever thus, and it is up to us whether we follow or not.
Public figures should try and set good examples rather than bad. Someone who achieved that is Michelle Obama.

Anonymous said...

I had to look the interview up and watch it, to recognize who he is. So sad to see someone so emotionally vulnerable. I remember him in happier days with Holly where they would both get the giggles and not be able to stop. So happy.
I liked your writing Pat. Everybody makes mistakes. I can imagine the headiness of affairs, though I have never had one, and always thought temptation must be a terrible thing to arrive uninvited in one's life, leaving you unable to think properly and resorting to lies.
Of course to be human is to find different people during your life to be attractive, but to be under the influence of some sort of bizarre headiness and bliss and then have to face family and friends in shame must be awful. I don't think people mean to deliberately hurt others - it just seems to be such an all-encompassing thing with the people concerned - an immense happiness high, and then a shuddering fall from grace.
I feel for everyone and so pleased I've never had someone cross my path in a situation that ultimately ends in anguish for all .- Pam, Aust.

rosemarie said...

I do not have a blog and rarely comment although I really enjoy reading the ones that interest me. You write such wise words and are obviously an extremely well balanced person. Well said, I always agree with what you comment on. I live outside the UK so only read what is reported in the press, but although I am a youngish and free thinking 78 year old it would seem that the world has gone completely crazy. I wish you a happy and relaxed weekend ~ the weather in the UK looks lovely whereas ours isn't!!
all the very best Ro (n.w. Italy)

JayCee said...

I don't tend to follow the news items in the media, particularly when they are frothing about some celebrity or politician and their misdemeanours.
With regard to temptation and infidelity, I have seen at close hand so much misery caused by it that I really don't wish to read about it elsewhere now.

the veg artist said...

I often say that I'm glad I'm a nobody.

Susan said...

Politics is a dirty game. In my opinion, some public figures and individuals in politics, look for indiscretions from any opponent and use them in a way that can be termed character assassination. Of course, the press goes mad and the internet jumps aboard as well.

Jennyff said...

It was shocking one night this week that the Schofield story was the first and main item on the BBC news, with everything happening in the world that was ridiculous. The media have manipulated this indiscretion into a feeding frenzy, it makes me ashamed that they are prepared to ruin the man’s life.

Tasker Dunham said...

Like most above, I don't watch the programme and this is of no interest to me at all. From what has been on the news, it might have been better if he had not tried to explain or apologise, and simply stepped out of the public view for a time.

John "By Stargoose And Hanglands" said...

Is it worth it? £159 a year for a TV licence to watch celebrities like these? I don't think so.

Anonymous said...

I have Zero interest in all the drama both here in the U.S. and other countries. I just wish news could be the news we need. Jackie in Georgia USA

Ellen D. said...

I don't know who he is and don't care about his personal life. Often the news seems to be trying to distract us from the important issues of the day and focus on the trivial things...
I don't feel that I can judge others so easily when I never know their whole story...

Barbara Anne said...

As has been said, "There is nothing new under the sun." and that's so true about indiscretions. DH and I have been married for 51 years and together for 2 years before that and sure, there have been attractions along the way. Just no follow-up because of vows we took and choices we each made.

Pat, you are so wise!

Hugs!

Heather said...

I think news programmes should bring us news, and not the latest celebrity gossip. If Philip Scofield had committed a crime the courts would have dealt with it. The BBC sinks further in my estimation. Such a shame when it was once the most reliable source of information and had integrity.

The Weaver of Grass said...

Good to read that so far we are all of one mind. Thank you for your thoughts on the matter.

Sal said...

The biggest problem in this country is the media. It loves to stick in the knife …and then stick it in and twist it a bit more just for added effect! Anything to bring someone down, in my opinion! I often think that it’s best to completely ignore the U.K. media because it can drag you down! There are far more uplifting things to do with one’s life!

Derek Faulkner said...

The media won't be happy now until they've hounded into suicide, bet they've already got their obituaries written. It's appalling how he's being treated.
His one big mistake was keeping quiet about what he'd been doing, he was in the media, he knows that these things come out eventually, so beat them to it and make it news straight away. I've never not admitted to anything that I've done, taking the mickey out of yourself is better than someone doing it to you.

Fiona said...

I find it disturbing that a 50 year old man had power over a teenager in his first job ( a boy he met when he was 10 years old) and that the organisation he was working for was aware of this inappropriate relationship and did absolutely nothing about it. And now, when this becomes public knowledge, the 50 year old is suddenly the victim. I don’t think it should be the top of the news, the train crash in India is a tragedy and the events on Bournemouth beach the other day, are 2 things I am much more interested in, but I don’t think he should be excused taking advantage of a minor, he should be held accountable, as should the people he worked for.

Damselfly said...

I am so weary of sensationalistic muck-raking, titillating tidbits "reported" on television and online for ratings/clicks, and all the celebrity cult gossip that was once relegated to the trashy tabloid rags.

What is the point of this focus/attention on this man and his indiscretions/relationships? If he has broken laws, he should be held accountable in the court of law and not in the court of public opinion. If he has not broken laws, who stands to gain from this character assassination?

The Weaver of Grass said...

Thank you for contributing everyone - seems we are largely in agreement.

jinxxxygirl said...

As consumers we often forget how much power we have in my opinion... If you don't care about it or don't like it then don't click on it or buy it etc... The only place we can reach them is in their pocket books.. Apparently enough people DO care to read about it or they wouldn't print it.. Hugs! deb

Bea said...

I have enjoyed him as a presenter/host and don't think we really need to know the sordid details of his personal life. (Although I'm reminded that he did come out on national television, so maybe folk think they are now entitled to know more.

Cro Magnon said...

I never watched his TV show, so don't know much about him. I do know he left his wife having said he was gay, I know his brother in is jail for something nasty, and I know he recently left TV (or was sacked) after an affair. None of these things merit his being hounded.

SueJay said...

I agree with everyone, particularly Jennyff. Fortunately we had recorded the news and were able to fast forward and miss most of the interview. He lied - to the public, his employers and, more importantly his friends.

Rachel Phillips said...

I was grateful to Jennff too for telling us about the BBC news bulletin leading with the Schofield item. I haven't watched, or listened to, the BBC news, or any mainstream media news channel for seven years now and I am sure I am doing the right thing more than ever.

The Weaver of Grass said...

Thanks everyone. Jeremy Clarkson (don't like the man or his politics or his attitude to life but do admire his ability to write a good, readable column so I always read him - it helps me write my posts) has written about him today - in particular about the Media in this sort of situation - in the Sunday Times. He has hit the nail on the head as he usually does whether you agree with him or not.

Derek Faulkner said...

Clarkson, (I'm a great fan) wrote some good and amusing comments, I really liked the bit about brambles and backsides.
I'm always amused by people who never watch the news and yet always know all about it.

Debby said...

I guess that I don't understand the media frenzy. The man had an affair. The fact is simply that it is not our business. I cannot see how it is. It is between him and his wife. It is something for them to sort out. We had a situation where a respected journalist, Matt Lauer, was fired after a review that specifically looked at whether he used his position to force women into sexual liasons. He was fired. He should have been.

The Schofield thing doesn't strike me as that at all. Two adults had an affair. The affair ended. It appears to be a one off. There are so many stories that should be reported and investigated. This is not one of them.

John. !58 pounds a year? My gosh. We paid $130 dollars a MONTH for wifi. We stream television.

The Weaver of Grass said...

Thanks everyone.