Friday 19 October 2012

Alterations to the Status Quo.

As one gets older or( as Yeats so ably puts it in Song of the Old Mother) 'the seed of the fire grows feeble and cold'alterations to the Status Quo - or even threatened alterations - are somehow much more disturbing.   Things - events, happenings,changes of fortune - seem to have been taken in my stride.   Now it is not so.  Is this an age thing?   Do you find that the older you get the less able you are to cope with changes?

First of all there is a threat to the health of my daughter-in-law (already a semi-invalid), which happily turned out not to be serious; then immediately another very dear friend has a stroke and goes away to hospital; then this morning I met another friend of many years standing, who is now in her eighties and walks very badly, so that even with a wheeled trolley in one hand and a stick in the other, her passage across the market square looked very precarious.
Later on, as our Friday group sat in the Golden Lion over coffee, as we do every Friday morning (I sometimes wonder what other clientelle think to us as we chat and laugh out loud) an elderly friend called to see us and fell in the doorway.   She has Parkinson's Disease and is really rather frail.

I don't find it depressing on the whole.   I feel very well and lead a very active life both socially and around the house, but surely this is an age thing.  The older one gets the more one's life is going to be altered and various inroads are going to be made into the Status Quo.  One answer is to have plenty of young friends - there is nothing better for keeping a body young than to have to keep up with younger people (and don't I know it as the farmer is considerably younger than me!)   But I would love to know how readers of my blog cope with such changes.

Incidentally - I do think daily blogging helps an awful lot.   It gets all kind of niggly things off one's chest and opens up issues to the wider world for comment.   So please do feel free to leave your suggestions.

12 comments:

George said...

Well, as you can surely tell from my recent blog, Pat, I sympathize completely with your depression over so many "alterations to the status quo." The status quo, of course, is always in the process of alteration, but the losses mount as one enters the third act of life. For my part, I simply try to cherish every moment of my own life; I try to make the most of my relationships with others; I try to be more compassionate; and, perhaps most important, I try not to resist the unfolding of the universe.

Heather said...

The death of my mother two years ago made me aware of my own mortality. Suddenly I was one of the most senior members of the family - my husband is 8 years older than I am. Your 'young' husband is obviously your elixir of youth! I tend to resist change but the sensible thing to do is to adapt to it and make the best of whatever comes along.

MorningAJ said...

To be honest, I don't handle change very well at all. I have had some health problems in recent years (actually I've had health problems all my life, but the new ones are more 'oldie' diseases) and every time something new crops up I feel a bit older. I hate it!

Gerry Snape said...

i love your daily post...glad you are feeling well, but you are right ...my lovely brother has parkinson's and that is quite a shock to us all!!

Irene said...

My parents are dead and my oldest sister just died and now I am the oldest of what is left of us. I am 58 years old but don't at all feel that way and maybe you would consider me a young'un. I'm planning on living to a very healthy old age, both my grandmothers lived into their 90's. I would not have considered either ogf them frail. I think I'll be a tough broad my whole life. xox

ChrisJ said...

I don't like changes at all. When my kitchen was remodeled, I had to stay away. One day we will have to go through all this old house of forty years of living, have a huge Garage Sale and move somewhere smaller. I threaten that I'm going to stay with my sister while all that is going on!!

Woman Seeking Center said...

I've been pondering your first lines for hours - an excellent post this - and I think the wearying of (overall)change and challenge is this: Somewhere by 50+ in life we've come to value and enjoy using our time towards thing that matter that we enjoy. Change and adaption (on any/all topics) deplete the hours we'd far rather spend in other arenas of our choosing.

Seeing those who we know and/or those we care for age and struggle is difficult. Emotionally it drives us to evaluate the waning of the physical self and the finite reality of ourselves, friends, parents. It causes us to see the evolution of our neighborhoods, communities depending on the age demographic. It (age) and the associated challenges are the largest longest lasting 'out of our control' aspects of life many of us have thus far encountered.

Tough stuff, all of it....

I cope by remembering the odd phrase that succinctly says it all -

"any day above ground is one with possibilities"! (lol)

Granted not all the possibilities are good, but neither are they all bad. It's a mix for certain!

Thank you for a post that set me thinking.....

Tom Stephenson said...

Whatever else changes, at least Status Quo doesn't. 'Whatever you want'.

Dave King said...

I can't say I find life on the whole depressing. Most depressing, I suppose, are the difficulties associated with Doreen being disabled.
I find some changes difficult - mostly those associated with my set routines. They make me concentrate more!!! Other changes I welcome for their difference.
One thing I do agree with, and that wholeheartedly: blogging helps!

Em Parkinson said...

I'm finding, as I head for 50, that instead of slowing down, there is more to do for others. Having a child at nearly 40 wasn't very clever and My Mother becomes more needy by the day but sometimes I feel like staying in bed in the morning!

thousandflower said...

I, too have a younger than me husband and I had my last daughter at 41. So although in my late 60's I think they help me not feel too out of things. I also worked with high school students until a few years ago and I loved that. Being around teens was fun. I did use the "I'm an old lady" line on occasion though to get round bad behavior. Worked well.

The Solitary Walker said...

"Alterations to the Status Quo''? Have they disbanded?